Surprised? Sexual intelligence exists, and we are going to prove it to you… Are you interested in finding out how to increase your sexual intelligence quotient? Know the foundations on which it is based and tips to develop it.
Nowadays, talking about intelligence suggests valuing the multiple abilities and capacities present in each one of us that will help us develop as people and adapt properly to the environment in which we live. Gone are the restrictive and reductionist visions of general intelligence, to make way for a global perspective in which there is room for aspects as relevant as emotions and previously ignored feelings. And also, why not, the sexual plane.
Already in 1983, Howard Gardner identified up to 8 types of intelligence: bodily-kinesthetic, linguistic-verbal, logical-mathematical, visual-spatial, musical, naturalistic, interpersonal and intrapersonal. This American psychologist was followed by the work of Salovey and Mayer on emotional intelligence, a term popularized years later by Daniel Goleman. In 2002, the psychologist couple Sheree Conrad and Michael Milburn surprise us with their work Sexual Intelligence, adding to the list a revolutionary conception that we will find below.
What is sexual intelligence?
Sexual intelligence refers to the type of knowledge closely related to our ability to enjoy a healthy, full and satisfying sex life. What does this mean? Well, it means that the higher your Sexual Intelligence coefficient, the better prepared you will be to be able to benefit from the benefits that sex can offer you.
Next question… can we talk about sexual intelligence as an immovable term? Not at all! Like any type of ability, this can and should be worked on in order to achieve the best version of ourselves in terms of love arts. I will never get tired of repeating it, sex is an important part of our lives, let’s give it the importance it deserves!
Now that we know what sexual intelligence is all about and we have found out that we can promote it, it is time to investigate the variables that will modulate this interesting factor in order to take advantage of them. If you want to pass the exam with flying colors, you have no choice but to continue reading…
How to lay the foundations of your sexual intelligence
As you can imagine, sexual intelligence is a broad and complex term that is nourished by numerous and varied aspects, but when it comes to highlighting the foundations on which a solid and robust sexual background is built, we agree in pointing to education, the self-knowledge and communication as directly responsible for it. Let’s see how to work them to increase your sexual intelligence quotient:
If there is an aspect in which sexologist in Delhi like to emphasize, this is without a doubt that of education. With it everything begins and on it is where we begin to build the people of tomorrow and, although it is important to apply it from childhood, be clear that it is never too late to learn. A correct affective-sexual education from children must contain clear and objective information about what we are and how we work, without forgetting to promote the attitudes and values that must prevail when relating to each other. Knowing our body and knowing how we can enjoy it will be as important as promoting respect for oneself and for others, the acceptance of diversity and making it clear that sex is synonymous with health, fun and enjoyment (if it makes us suffer, something is wrong).
This that seems so simple, in reality constitutes a great challenge. Sex education has often been ignored in schools or health services and clumsily assumed by religion, the mass media or the family environment itself, among others, thus promoting prejudice, myths and false beliefs around it. Today we talk more about sex, but not necessarily better; we find more sexual information, but not always rigorous; we practice more sex, but it does not mean that we enjoy it more … quantity is not synonymous with quality and knowing how to discern between good and bad is not always easy.
Once we have accurate information about how our body works and how it behaves sexually, it’s time to take action. How is this done? experimenting, we have no other. Keep in mind that we are not machines and fortunately we are not all cut from the same cloth. In order to carry out what I like, I first have to know what I like… obviously, right? Knowing yourself sexually is fundamental and is something that is often mistakenly overlooked. Perhaps we are once again facing another major sinkhole in the construction of the pillars of this type of intelligence, since the issue of self-knowledge has also been subjected to censorship and harsh criticism. Since we were little, many teach us that “that” (genitals) should not be touched and they scare us with ridiculous consequences if we do, feeding fallacies and provoking feelings of guilt and shame, ignoring that here it is not about prohibiting, it is about guiding and teaching what is the ideal time and place to do it.
In the case of girls, this circumstance is exacerbated, with female masturbation being a taboo subject that fortunately is now beginning to be uncovered. In any case, be clear: there is nothing more wonderful than knowing our own body and connecting with ourselves, investigating, experimenting, putting ourselves to the test and above all, loving ourselves very much!
After having formed ourselves concisely and after having found what satisfies us, now is the time to speak. Yes, talk, communicate with our partner in sexual adventures to find out what he likes and, at the same time, trust him with what we like. Be honest and tell him what you would be interested in improving, what you would change about your meetings or take the opportunity to tell him that what you did yesterday drives you crazy and you want to repeat. Yes, talking, that easy and many times that complicated at the same time.
What is clear is that here the telepathic powers that some people think they possess do not work, and I assure you that what you do not tell him, he does not have to know. Believe me, people understand each other by talking!
Tips to develop the potential of your sexual intelligence
Boosting your sexual intelligence is investing in well-being and, without a doubt, it will always bring you benefits both personally and as a couple. If sex is health, sexual intelligence will be able to increase our physical and mental health, while developing our emotional intelligence and freeing us from prejudices, myths and false beliefs. The power of knowing ourselves will imply respecting and loving ourselves more, triggering our self-esteem and reflecting this circumstance in our intimate encounters. Sexual intelligence will take us away from the routine and will encourage us to try new things… do you need more reasons?
Here are some tips for developing it:
- Knowledge does not take up space, so nourish yourself and soak up sex; read about sex, write about sex… think about sex!
- Take your time to assess your sexual experiences; what do you lack, what do you have left over, what would you like to repeat, what do you want to inquire about…
- If you don’t like something… tell him! If you love something… tell him too!
- In sex, anything goes, as long as it’s not harmful to us or our sexual partner… So maybe it’s time to put new things into practice!
- Sex is not limited to the genitals, remember that the skin is the largest organ of the human body, are you ready to travel without fear on the wide map of erogenous zones?